Weekend Funnies

* They say that marriage makes a man dizzy, and it’s true. As soon as
I got a wife, I lost my balance at the bank.
* Men want 3 qualities in wives: Economist in kitchen, artist in home
& devil in bed. But they get artist in kitchen, devil in home &
economist in Bed.
* Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!
* Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. U r beautiful, I luv u.
After marriage: Roses are dead, I’m blue. U r my headache, one day I’ll kill
u.
* Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with
friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other
person has, you wish you had ordered that.
* Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come..
* Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It’s a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!
* Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
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